Cry Little Sister, Swallow your Soul, and Cenobite Party. The Horrors of 1987.

It's no secret that I love some cheesy 80's "heartthrob" horror. Usually I realize that what I am enjoying is total trash. However, once in a while, a film pops out that looks like garbage on paper but ends up being a serious piece of treasure. Motorcycle riding rockn'roll vampires, both of the Coreys, a greased up saxophone dude. Yeah, it shouldn't have worked but it turned out fucking amazing. Then there's another film that shouldn't have worked. "Let's make the same movie we did the first time but with way more money and way more slapstick comedy." A recipe for disaster but it's horror-comedy gold. Truthfully I'm surprised my third film even got made. Here's Clive Barkers pitch: "I wrote a story about a girl who battles some S&M demons who are upset that her sleazy uncle played with their puzzle box." Man, I think everyone did lots of coke in the 80s and thank the Goddess because it gave us some crazy good films.

1987

1. The Lost Boys (Directed by Joel Schumacher)

IMDB plot: After moving to a new town, two brothers discover that the area is a haven for vampires.

2. Evil Dead II (Directed by Sam Raimi)

IMDB plot: The lone survivor of an onslaught of flesh-possessing spirits holes up in a cabin with a group of strangers while the demons continue their attack.

3. Hellraiser (Directed by Clive Barker)

IMDB plot: An unfaithful wife encounters the zombie of her dead lover; the demonic cenobites are pursuing him after he escaped their sadomasochistic underworld.

Bonus Film!!! Finally a female director on this list. Bigelow would move on to directed such non-horror thriller-action faves as Point Break and Blue Steel. Cowboy vampires drenched in neon ennui. Hell yes.

Near Dark (Directed by Kathryn Bigelow)

IMDB plot: A small-town farmer's son reluctantly joins a traveling group of vampires after he is bitten by a beautiful drifter.

Alright ghouls and goblins. I hope you enjoyed 1987. See you tomorrow for 1988. xoxo

Game Over Man, Werefly, and Thrill Me. The Horror of 1986.

They mostly come out at night, mostly. Ellen Ripley is one of the most badass action heroes ever and I wanted to be her when I was little. Well, I wanted to be a cross between her and Lita Ford. Big hair and skimpy glam metal outfit. Flamethrower in hand, mowing down scores of terrifying aliens. Yeah, I still wanna be that. You know what I don't want to be? I don't want to be a half human half fly creature that has to puke on my food to eat it. Screw that. That's just disgusting. I also don't want space slugs living in my brain and turning me into mush. I don't want that either. 

 1986

1. Aliens (Directed by James Cameron)

IMDB plot: Ellen Ripley is rescued by a deep salvage team after being in hypersleep for 57 years. The moon that the Nostromo visited has been colonized, but contact is lost. This time, colonial marines have impressive firepower, but will that be enough?

2. The Fly (Directed by David Cronenberg)

IMDB plot: A brilliant but eccentric scientist begins to transform into a giant man/fly hybrid after one of his experiments goes horribly wrong.

3. Night of the Creeps (Directed by Fred Dekker)

IMDB plot: Alien brain parasites, entering humans through the mouth, turn their host into a killing zombie. Some teenagers start to fight against them.

I was going to put some bonus films but there are just too many that I enjoy and couldn't decide which to add. So, just head out to your local video store and see which VHS covers look the best to you. Good luck. That's it creeps. See you tomorrow for 1987. xoxo